There's Something There That Wasn't There Before

 

While Jon and I were still long distance, I started working in early childhood, which I believe kept me fit and healthy. I averaged about 10,000 steps at work a day and enjoyed getting involved in the activities the children were doing such as PE and music. I could even see my own coordination and rhythm improving, which is quite amusing!

Young and still quite lean, I didn't see too many physical challenges initially. I noticed my desperation for carbs, but otherwise there wasn't really anything particularly noticeable. I didn't have acne or bad facial hair or any of those other typical tell-tale signs. 

When I was probably 3 or 4 years into my job, I started getting chronic infections that I thought were thrush. I'd go to the doctors and tell them, they'd make me do countless urine tests and attempted to swab me. I remember telling the Doctor that I couldn't be swabbed, but she attempted anyway and I remember screaming out in pain as she prodded me. "We didn't even really get the swab inside." She said, sounding a little put out. I apologised profusely for what I couldn't control.

When the lab results came back, they'd be inconclusive. "You don't have thrush," She'd tell me "I can't see any bacteria on the results." I would tell her that I was itchy and in discomfort and we'd go over safe soaps to use, types of underwear etc. All the things that I already knew and had checked over a million times. Often doctors would just say "I can see the skin is aggravated" and leave it at that. The go-to term became "bacterial vaginosis" an umbrella term for an infection they basically can't identify.

The itching and discomfort progressed to where I struggled to sit cross-legged on the floor. I couldn't sleep on my side. I could have no water in my system and feel like I needed to use the bathroom. As I'd lay in bed at night, I'd feel like I'd have to get up multiple times a night to "go." Once there nothing would happen.

 I was so frustrated and overtired from lack of sleep. I didn't understand why all these tests said there was nothing there. I knew something was wrong. I didn't know what was happening to me. I'd read online about weak pelvic floors, so I started doing kegel exercises because I was terrified that I had a weak bladder. Something I'd never had in my life. 

My Mum finally told me to bite the bullet and get help. So with her support and Jon's, I booked an appointment to meet with a gynecologist and finally, hopefully, maybe get some answers.